I’ve been working hard. I mean, really hard these past few weeks. And sometimes when the clock ticks past midnight, again, and my head finally hits the pillow I wonder whether it’s all really worth it. Is my business really going to grow, is my writing really benefiting anyone? God is this really what you have for me?
Oh yes, I have doubts, like I know you do. Is this all that God has for me, am I in the right place, am I going in the right direction, is God even in this? It can plague me after every failure, disappointment and epic work/family day (because it’s never just one or the other!).
I pray about my life, my family, my marriage, my kids and my future. I pray over it because I want it to have meaning, purpose and success. And I know to get anywhere I need to follow God’s lead. But it’s hard, long days with blood sweat and tears thrown in from time to time.
As I was going to bed Tuesday night those doubts starting stirring in my head again. I’m just so tired God, please tell me this is your will. As soon as my head hit the pillow I felt this burst of faith inside my heart and I heard God speak his love and will over me.
I’m proud of you, I love you, keep going, I’m with you.
Wow, it doesn’t get much better than that. And instead of going to bed deflated and defeated I went to be with the biggest smile on my face and woke up bursting to tell my husband the word from God. And it gave us faith, focus and hope for the day of work ahead.
I know that my God is with me. His hope is an anchor for my soul and I feel that now more than ever in my life. He is my centre, my focus and my goal. I have Christ in me, the hope of glory. For a long time I couldn’t understand why His glory would be MY hope? Because, like my wise father shared with me today, without faith we have nothing.
And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him. Hebrews 11:6
When in doubt, chose faith. When you’re buried in the work load, lost in your indecision or failing to find a pursuit – chose faith. Be anchored by God and seek him with everything you’ve got. He’s right there with you and he’ll show you the way.